I want...

...to be able to buy clothes at the mall in a "regular" person store.  Instead of online because stores don't sell plus-size clothing in the actual store (Old Navy I'm looking at you) or in plus-size stores.

I want to be able to be comfortable when teaching; which in the lower elementary special education world means being comfortable kneeling, squatting, chasing, and everything in between.

I want to be able to walk Owen without feeling disgusting or (worse) getting tired too early.

I want to sit in an airplane seat without the arm-rests digging into my hips and feeling as though I'm encroaching on the person next to me (more than my tics already do).

I want to be able to look at pictures of myself without hating what I see.

I want to be able to ride a horse again; any horse I want without fear that I'm going to hurt them because I weigh too much.  I want to dance through dressage moves and fly over jumps and not be self-conscious about how I look.

I want to be able to buy cute clothes.  And wear dresses.  I have no fashion sense, but all the same, I want to look cute instead of wearing things that disguise my weight and blend into the background.

I want to be able to walk up more than one flight of stairs without feeling out of breath.

I want to be healthy.  My body is failing on so many levels; it is a matter of time before I get something like arthritis or permanently damage a joint that needs surgery to fix.  I don't want to be sitting in a doctor's office (ugh) having them telling me I'm pre-diabetic or that my cholesterol is too high or any one of the things that I could face.

I want to wear bright colors and not be self conscious.

I want to be able to sit down in jeans and not be uncomfortable because the waist band digs into my stomach.

I want to feel confident in my body.