Proud.

A few weeks ago I was posting why I was embarrassed.  So, today, I thought I would write the things I'm proud about.

I am proud that I can now do a 30-second plank on my knees without getting all shaky and wobbly, collapsing to the ground, and wanting to throw up.  Next step, plank on my toes.

I am really freaking proud that I am waking up at 7:30 on Saturdays to get to the gym for an 8:30 body conditioning class and 9:30 Zumba.  And the funny thing is I feel pretty awake once I start working out; though, I'm ready for a nap around 2:00 in the afternoon now.

I am proud that I am lifting 5-pound and 6-pound weights.  A few weeks ago I started with the 3-pound weights; I am trying to increase one pound a week for a little while right now.

I am proud that I manage to go the right way (almost) all the time in Zumba and kickboxing; and before you laugh, this is a big accomplishment for me.

On the same thread, I am proud that I've only hauled off and punched myself once in kickboxing.  And I have not kicked, hit, or run into anybody in my classes, even when I am going the right way and they are not.  (Seriously, people?! Go the right way or stay away!)

I am proud of the fact that I can use the step for the entirety of the step class; when I started I ended up on the floor doing the same motions as the rest of the class for about 30 minutes and for a good long while, I just marched.  Now, I can keep up with the class on the step, and when I miss a move it's because I have no clue what they're doing, not because I'm too huffy and puffy.  (And I've only really fallen off the step once, so I'm proud of that!)  Yes, my step is flat on the ground without risers, but I'm planning to add those soon (once I stop falling and tripping on the step).

I am shocked proud that I am concerned about my plan for working out in a few weeks when my gym is closed for renovations (I'm not sure which classes will be cancelled, and which won't be).

I am proud of the way I can feel my body changing, even if all I feel are sore muscles.  I am noticing muscles developing, and even if I can't see them, I know once I lose the padding, the muscles will be there.

I am proud that I can keep up for not one, not two, but three hours of exercise.  Even if my brain doesn't think I can, my body is strong enough to do it.

And I am proud that I am doing this for me.  I want my body to get as healthy as I can get it; I'm losing the weight for me.  Not because of pressure from anybody else.  And this is the first time that this is really about me, and I am very proud of that.

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8/20: 1 hour Zumba
8/21: 1 hour body conditioning, 1 hour kickboxing, 1 hour Zumba